Effortless English Learning - How to Disagree Politely in English.

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Effortless English Learning

How to Disagree Politely in English.  

https://youtu.be/Fo8Jvznzm0U

Alison: Welcome back to Effortless English Podcasts!

Will: This is the Effortless English Learning series, where we help you speak English naturally.

Alison: Today, we’re talking about something really useful.

Alison: How to disagree politely in English.

Will: We all have opinions, but sometimes, saying "I disagree" can feel awkward.

Alison: Exactly!

Alison: If you’re too direct, people might think you're rude.

Will: But if you're too soft, they might not even realize you disagree!

Alison: So, how do you find the right balance?

Alison: That’s what we’ll explore today.

Will: And before we start, don’t forget to subscribe to our podcast!

Alison: If you’re watching on YouTube, hit the subscribe button below.

Will: And leave a comment!

Will: We love hearing from you.

Alison: Oh, and one more thing.

Alison: If English isn’t your first language, we’ve got subtitles!

Will: Just turn on the CC option and choose your language.

Alison: Alright, let’s get into it!

Will: How do we say "no" without sounding mean?

Will: Let’s find out.

Alison: So, why is it important to express disagreement?

Will: Well, in school, at work, or even with friends, we all have different opinions.

Alison: And that’s a good thing!

Alison: If everyone agrees all the time, nothing ever improves.

Will: Right! Imagine a team at work making a big decision.

Will: If no one speaks up, they might choose a bad idea.

Alison: Exactly.

Alison: Maybe you see a problem, but you stay silent.

Alison: Later, when things go wrong, you regret not saying anything.

Will: And it’s not just about work.

Will: In daily life, we disagree about food, travel, or even what movie to watch.

Alison: Yeah, I mean, you and I never agree on movies!

Will: That’s because you have terrible taste.

Alison: Excuse me?

Will: Just kidding!

Will: But seriously, imagine always saying "yes" to things you don’t like.

Alison: That would be frustrating.

Alison: If you never say what you really think, people won’t know the real you.

Will: And you might end up doing things you don’t enjoy.

Alison: Right.

Alison: But on the other hand, if you disagree too strongly, it can cause problems.

Will: Oh, for sure.

Will: If you say "That’s a terrible idea!" people might get upset.

Alison: So, the key is to disagree in a polite way.

Will: Exactly.

Will: That way, you can share your thoughts without hurting feelings.

Alison: And that’s what we’re going to help you with today.

Will: We’ll show you how to say "I disagree" in a way that sounds friendly.

Alison: But first, let’s talk about our own experiences.

Will: Times when we got it totally wrong.

Alison: Alright, let’s talk about our own mistakes.

Alison: Times when we didn’t handle disagreement very well.

Will: Oh, I’ve got a great one!

Will: But you go first.

Alison: Okay, so this happened when I was in college.

Alison: I was working on a group project with three classmates.

Will: Group projects.

Will: Always a nightmare.

Alison: Right?

Alison: So, one guy had this idea for our presentation.

Alison: But I knew it wasn’t a good idea.

Will: Why not?

Alison: It was way too complicated.

Alison: We had a short time limit, and his plan had too many details.

Will: So, what did you do?

Alison: Nothing.

Alison: I didn’t say anything.

Will: Wait, nothing?

Alison: Yeah, I didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

Alison: So, I just went along with it.

Will: And what happened?

Alison: It was a disaster!

Alison: We ran out of time during our presentation.

Alison: The professor said we didn’t explain things clearly.

Will: Ouch.

Alison: Yeah, and the worst part?

Alison: Afterward, my classmates said, "Why didn’t you say something earlier?"

Will: Oh no.

Will: So, you kept quiet to be nice, but it backfired.

Alison: Exactly.

Alison: I learned that speaking up is important, as long as you do it nicely.

Will: Good lesson!

Will: Now, my turn.

Will: Mine is the complete opposite of yours.

Alison: Let me guess.

Alison: You were too honest?

Will: Oh, yeah.

Will: I was at my first job in London.

Will: In a meeting, my boss presented an idea.

Alison: And you didn’t like it?

Will: No, it was terrible.

Will: So, I said, "This won’t work. It’s a bad idea."

Alison: Oh no.

Will: Yeah.

Will: The room went completely silent.

Will: My boss just stared at me.

Alison: Yikes.

Alison: What happened next?

Will: After the meeting, my coworker pulled me aside.

Will: He said, "Will, you need to be more polite."

Alison: Did you realize your mistake?

Will: Oh, yes.

Will: I should have said something like, "I see your point, but I have some concerns."

Will: Instead of "This is bad."

Alison: So, you learned that being too direct can be a problem, too.

Will: Exactly.

Will: You need to find the right way to say things.

Alison: And that’s what we’ll talk about next.

Will: Common situations where you need to disagree.

Alison: Now that we know why disagreeing is important, let’s talk about real-life situations.

Will: Yes!

Will: When do we actually need to say, "I don’t agree"?

Alison: A big one is when making plans with friends.

Will: Oh, definitely.

Will: Imagine your friend says, "Let’s go camping this weekend!"

Alison: But you hate camping.

Alison: You don’t want to sleep in a tent.

Will: And you don’t want to fight off mosquitoes.

Alison: Right!

Alison: But if you just say, "No, I don’t want to," it might sound rude.

Will: Instead, you could say, "That sounds fun, but I’d prefer something else."

Alison: Or, "I’m not really a fan of camping. How about a day trip instead?"

Will: Perfect.

Will: You’re still disagreeing, but in a friendly way.

Alison: Okay, next situation: work.

Alison: What if your boss suggests something you think won’t work?

Will: Oof.

Will: Tricky situation.

Will: You can’t just say, "That’s a terrible idea," like I did.

Alison: No, that would be a bad move.

Alison: But you also shouldn’t stay silent if you see a problem.

Will: Right.

Will: So, instead of saying, "That won’t work," you can say, "I see your point, but I have some concerns."

Alison: Or, "That’s an interesting idea. Maybe we could also consider another approach?"

Will: Smart.

Will: You’re showing respect while still giving your opinion.

Alison: Exactly.

Alison: Okay, last one: school.

Alison: What if you’re in a class discussion and you disagree with someone’s point?

Will: Oh, that happens all the time.

Will: In debates, people always have different opinions.

Alison: Right, and that’s good!

Alison: But if you say, "You’re wrong," it can sound too strong.

Will: Instead, try, "That’s an interesting perspective, but I see it differently."

Alison: Or, "I get your point, but here’s another way to look at it."

Will: That way, you keep the discussion open and polite.

Alison: And people will actually listen to you.

Will: Exactly.

Will: So, in any situation—friends, work, or school—the key is how you say it.

Alison: And that’s what we’ll cover next.

Will: How Americans and Brits express disagreement differently.

Alison: So, let’s talk about how Americans and Brits express disagreement.

Will: Ah, yes.

Will: The direct vs. indirect debate.

Alison: Exactly.

Alison: Americans tend to be more direct.

Alison: If we don’t agree, we just say it.

Will: Yeah, Americans might say, "I don’t think that’s right."

Will: Or, "I disagree with that."

Alison: Right.

Alison: It’s clear and to the point.

Alison: But in the UK, it’s a bit different, right?

Will: Oh, very different.

Will: In the UK, we like to soften disagreement.

Alison: How?

Will: Instead of "I disagree," we might say, "I’m not so sure about that."

Alison: That sounds much softer.

Will: Exactly.

Will: Or, "You may have a point, but..."

Alison: So, even when you don’t agree, you sound polite.

Will: That’s the goal.

Will: We often avoid saying "no" directly.

Alison: But doesn’t that get confusing?

Will: Oh, all the time!

Will: Sometimes, British people disagree so politely that others don’t even realize it.

Alison: That’s funny.

Alison: In the U.S., people expect clear answers.

Will: And in the UK, people expect politeness first.

Alison: So, an American might say, "That’s wrong."

Will: And a Brit would say, "I see what you mean, but I wonder if there’s another way."

Alison: Same meaning, different style.

Will: Exactly.

Will: Americans value clarity.

Will: Brits value politeness.

Alison: And that’s why cultural differences matter.

Will: Right!

Will: Understanding these styles helps you communicate better.

Alison: So next, let’s look at specific phrases.

Will: How to disagree politely in American and British English.

Alison: Alright, let’s focus on American English.

Alison: How do Americans disagree politely?

Will: Yeah, give us the classic American phrases.

Alison: Okay!

Alison: One simple way is, "I see your point, but..."

Will: Ah, that’s a good one.

Will: You start with something positive before disagreeing.

Alison: Exactly.

Alison: Like, "I see your point, but I think there’s another way."

Will: That sounds much softer than just saying, "I don’t agree."

Alison: Right!

Alison: Another phrase is, "I get what you’re saying, but..."

Will: So, you first show that you understand the other person.

Alison: Yes!

Alison: Americans like to acknowledge the other person’s idea first.

Will: Makes sense.

Will: It keeps the conversation friendly.

Alison: Exactly.

Alison: Now, if you want to sound even softer, try, "I’m not sure I agree with that."

Will: Oh, that’s a good one.

Will: You’re not saying "no," but you’re also not saying "yes."

Alison: Right!

Alison: It makes disagreement sound less strong.

Will: And what about casual situations?

Will: Like, disagreeing with a friend?

Alison: Great question.

Alison: With friends, you can say, "I don’t know about that."

Will: That sounds super natural.

Alison: Yeah!

Alison: It’s a soft way to say, "I don’t think so."

Will: So, when should we use these phrases?

Alison: Good question.

Alison: If you’re in a formal setting, like work, use "I see your point, but..."

Will: Because it’s polite and professional.

Alison: Exactly.

Alison: If you’re with friends, you can say, "I don’t know about that."

Will: Because it sounds natural and relaxed.

Alison: Right!

Alison: The key is to match the situation.

Will: Got it.

Will: And next, we’ll look at British English.

Alison: How Brits disagree politely in their own way.

Will: Now, let’s talk about how Brits disagree politely.

Alison: Right!

Alison: We know Brits love to soften their words.

Will: Absolutely.

Will: In the UK, being too direct can sound impolite.

Alison: So, what’s a polite way to disagree?

Will: One classic phrase is, "I’m not quite sure about that."

Alison: Oh, that sounds very soft.

Will: Exactly.

Will: Instead of saying, "I disagree," you just express doubt.

Alison: Smart.

Alison: What else?

Will: Another common one is, "I see what you mean, but..."

Alison: Ah, so similar to American English!

Will: Yes, but Brits use it even more.

Will: It makes disagreement sound less direct.

Alison: Got it.

Alison: And what about casual situations?

Will: With friends, you might say, "I wouldn’t say that exactly."

Alison: So, instead of saying "You’re wrong," you just say it differently.

Will: Exactly.

Will: Or, "I think we might see this differently."

Alison: Very polite!

Will: That’s the goal.

Will: Brits often avoid direct disagreement.

Alison: So, when should we use these phrases?

Will: If you’re at work, try, "I’m not quite sure about that."

Alison: Because it sounds very polite and professional.

Will: Exactly.

Will: With friends, you can say, "I wouldn’t say that exactly."

Alison: Because it’s soft but still clear.

Will: Right!

Will: The key is to disagree without sounding rude.

Alison: So, whether you’re in the U.S. or the U.K., knowing these phrases helps a lot.

Will: Exactly.

Will: And next, let’s talk about common mistakes.

Alison: What NOT to do when disagreeing.

Alison: Now, let’s talk about mistakes.

Will: Yes!

Will: What NOT to do when disagreeing.

Alison: First, let’s talk about being too direct.

Will: Oh, I know this one.

Will: Like saying, "That’s wrong."

Alison: Exactly!

Alison: If you say that, people might feel attacked.

Will: Right.

Will: Even if you’re correct, it sounds too strong.

Alison: Instead, try, "I see your point, but I think there’s another way."

Will: Much better.

Will: You’re disagreeing, but politely.

Alison: Exactly.

Alison: Now, what about the opposite mistake?

Will: Being too indirect?

Alison: Yes!

Alison: If you’re too soft, people might not realize you disagree.

Will: Oh, like saying, "Hmm, interesting idea."

Will: But you actually mean, "I don’t agree."

Alison: Yes!

Alison: If you never say what you really think, nothing changes.

Will: So, how do we fix this?

Alison: Be polite, but clear.

Alison: Instead of "Interesting idea," try "That’s an interesting idea, but I see it differently."

Will: Ah, so you’re still soft, but people know your opinion.

Alison: Exactly.

Will: So, the key is balance.

Alison: Yes!

Alison: Don’t be too direct, but don’t be too indirect either.

Will: And if you practice, you’ll find the right tone.

Alison: Exactly.

Alison: Next, let’s wrap things up.

Will: And invite our listeners to share their experiences.

Alison: Alright, let’s sum up what we learned today.

Will: Yes!

Will: We talked about why expressing disagreement is important.

Alison: And how staying silent can cause problems.

Will: Or how being too direct can make things awkward.

Alison: We also looked at how Americans and Brits disagree differently.

Will: Americans are more direct.

Alison: Brits like to be indirect and polite.

Will: We also shared some useful phrases.

Alison: Like, "I see your point, but..." for polite disagreement.

Will: Or, "I’m not quite sure about that." for a softer tone.

Alison: And we talked about common mistakes.

Will: Being too strong or too soft.

Alison: The key is balance—clear, but polite.

Will: Exactly!

Will: Now, we want to hear from you!

Alison: Yes!

Alison: Have you ever had trouble disagreeing in English?

Will: Or maybe you said something too directly and made things awkward?

Alison: Tell us your stories in the comments!

Will: We read them all, so don’t be shy!

Alison: And if you found this useful, don’t forget to subscribe.

Will: Hit that button and stay tuned for more!

Alison: Thanks for joining us today!

Will: See you next time!