Wednesday, April 30, 2025

What NOT to Talk About in English Small Talk. | EEP Learning

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What NOT to Talk About in English Small Talk. 

https://youtu.be/WcEZgJ42Ii8

Alison: Hi everyone, welcome back to Effortless English Podcasts.

Alison: I am Alison.

Will: And I am Will.

Alison: You are listening to the Effortless English Learning series.

Will: Where we explore real-life English for everyday situations.

Alison: Before we dive in, remember to subscribe to our channel.

Will: And turn on the CC subtitles if you need them.

Alison: We have subtitles in many languages to help you follow along.

Will: So make sure you have them ready if you want extra support.

Alison: Alright, today’s topic is all about tricky conversations.

Will: Yes, it is about topics you should avoid when chatting with others.

Alison: This happens a lot, especially when you meet someone new.

Will: Right, sometimes you say something and you can feel the room freeze.

Alison: Like that time when I asked a guy about his job and he just smiled awkwardly.

Will: Oh, I know that feeling too well.

Will: One time I asked a friend about their age...

Will: And the silence that followed could have broken glass.

Alison: Yes, some things are just better left unsaid.

Will: Especially if you want the conversation to stay friendly and fun.

Alison: So today, we will talk about what topics to avoid.

Will: And we will also show you the differences between the U.S. and the U.K.

Alison: You will learn some handy phrases to move the talk in a better way.

Will: Plus, we will share some funny stories from our own experiences.

Alison: Because trust me, we have had some very awkward moments!

Will: Oh yes, you do not want to miss those.

Alison: By the end of this episode, you will know how to keep a chat smooth and easy.

Will: And you will sound more natural whether you are speaking to an American or a Brit.

Alison: So grab your coffee or tea, and let’s get started!




Alison: So, why do we need to avoid some topics when we chat?

Will: Well, one big reason is culture.

Alison: Yes, what is fine to ask in one place might be rude somewhere else.

Will: For example, in some cultures, asking about someone’s salary is normal.

Alison: But in the U.S., talking about money can make people very uncomfortable.

Will: It is seen as very private and sometimes even bad manners.

Alison: Right, and personal background matters too.

Will: People have different beliefs, values, and experiences.

Alison: A topic that feels normal to you might be very sensitive for someone else.

Will: Like asking about religion at a casual party.

Alison: Or talking politics at a family dinner!

Will: These topics can start arguments fast.

Alison: And that is not what you want when you are just trying to make friends.

Will: Exactly, the goal of chatting is to build a connection.

Alison: If someone feels hurt or judged, that connection breaks.

Will: Also, people remember how you make them feel more than what you say.

Alison: So even if you do not mean harm, the wrong topic can leave a bad memory.

Will: That is why it is better to keep talks light and easy, at least at first.

Alison: Yes, deep talks can come later, once trust is built.

Will: Let’s look at a quick example.

Alison: Imagine you meet someone new and the first thing you ask is, "How much do you earn?"

Will: That person will likely feel shocked or even insulted.

Alison: Now, if you ask, "What do you like to do on weekends?"

Will: That is much safer and invites a happy, relaxed talk.

Alison: Here is another case.

Will: Suppose you dive into politics right away.

Alison: Even if you agree, it can still make people tense.

Will: It is better to find common ground with topics like hobbies, food, or travel.

Alison: Yes, start with simple things everyone enjoys.

Will: Once the chat flows, you can slowly move to deeper topics if it feels right.

Alison: Think of a conversation like a garden.

Will: You need to plant seeds of trust before picking the big fruits.

Alison: I love that picture!

Will: Me too, it helps me remember to be patient.

Alison: So next time you meet someone, think before you bring up a risky topic.

Will: A little care at the start can save you a lot of trouble later.

Alison: And it will make your English conversations much smoother too.

Will: Trust us, we have learned this the hard way.

Alison: But that is a story for another part of today’s show!

Will: Stay with us, because next we will talk about what Americans usually avoid.




Alison: Now, let’s talk about what topics people avoid in the U.S.

Will: This is very important if you want to sound natural in America.

Alison: First, money is a big no-no in most talks.

Will: Asking about how much someone makes or spends is very rude.

Alison: Even if you are just curious, it is seen as too personal.

Will: Another sensitive topic is politics.

Alison: People have strong feelings about political issues.

Will: A small talk can turn into a heated fight very fast.

Alison: So most people stay away from political talks, especially with strangers.

Will: Religion is also a careful topic.

Alison: Asking about someone’s faith can make them feel judged.

Will: Or it can lead to uncomfortable debates.

Alison: In short, money, politics, and religion are the big three to avoid.

Will: Now, what do you do if someone brings up one of these topics?

Alison: Americans often use simple phrases to steer the talk away.

Will: One common line is, "Oh, that’s interesting! By the way..."

Alison: Then you quickly jump to a safer topic, like food or weekend plans.

Will: Another line you might hear is, "Let’s save that for another time!"

Alison: This sounds polite but makes it clear you do not want to dive in now.

Will: Or you can simply laugh and say, "That’s above my pay grade!"

Alison: That phrase means it is too serious or complicated for you to discuss.

Will: Let’s give a real example.

Alison: Imagine someone asks, "What do you think about the election?"

Will: You can reply, "Oh, that’s interesting! By the way, have you tried the new cafe down the street?"

Alison: Quick, smooth, and no one gets hurt.

Will: Here’s another case.

Alison: Someone asks, "What church do you go to?"

Will: You can smile and say, "That’s a deep one! Hey, did you watch the game last night?"

Alison: This keeps things light and friendly.

Will: Americans value comfort and easy talks, especially early on.

Alison: So these small tricks can help you a lot.

Will: Remember, the goal is to build trust, not to win a debate.

Alison: Save the deep talks for close friends and family.

Will: In casual chats, light and happy is the way to go.

Alison: And knowing these little tricks makes your English sound much more natural.

Will: Plus, you will avoid a lot of awkward moments!

Alison: Trust me, I have had my share of those when I first moved to the States.

Will: Me too, even in the U.K., but that is another story.

Alison: Now that we know how Americans handle it,

Will: Next, let’s see how things are a bit different in the U.K.!




Will: Now let’s move across the pond and see how things work in the U.K.

Alison: I love hearing about British ways of chatting.

Will: Well, one thing you should know is that Brits are very private people.

Alison: Yes, asking about money is a big no there too, right?

Will: Absolutely, asking about someone’s salary or spending is very bad form.

Alison: And what about personal life questions?

Will: Those are tricky too.

Will: Asking deep questions about someone's family, love life, or plans can seem rude.

Alison: So if you meet someone in the U.K., stick to safe topics first.

Will: Exactly, things like the weather, hobbies, or even traffic are good choices.

Alison: I have heard that Brits also dislike too much self-praise.

Will: Very true, bragging is seen as bad taste.

Alison: Even if you are very proud, it is better to stay modest.

Will: Right, people like a little self-joke rather than big bold claims.

Alison: So if someone just won a prize, they might say, "Oh, I just got lucky."

Will: Instead of, "I’m the best!" which would sound strange.

Alison: Now, what do Brits do when a sensitive topic comes up?

Will: They are masters at soft, polite dodging.

Alison: Sounds fun! Give us some examples.

Will: One common phrase is, "Oh, that’s a tricky one!"

Alison: This shows you know the topic is deep but you are stepping away gently.

Will: Another line is, "I think that’s above my pay grade!"

Alison: Same as Americans use sometimes.

Will: Yes, but with a slightly more dry humor.

Alison: What about changing the topic?

Will: A favorite trick is to say, "Speaking of which..."

Will: Then link to something totally different but lightly related.

Alison: Like if someone asks about your salary, you could say, "Speaking of numbers, did you see the game score last night?"

Will: Brilliant move, very smooth!

Alison: Or if someone dives too deep into personal life, you could say, "Oh, life’s full of surprises, isn’t it?"

Will: And then laugh and move on to talk about something neutral.

Alison: I love how polite and clever these ways are.

Will: Yes, it keeps the mood light without hurting feelings.

Alison: So next time you chat with a Brit, remember to keep it soft and easy.

Will: And if you need to dodge a tough one, now you know how.

Alison: These small tricks make a big difference in real talks.

Will: You sound more natural and you build better connections.

Alison: Plus, you avoid those heavy, awkward moments we all fear.

Will: Trust me, even I have slipped before and learned it the hard way.

Alison: Same here!

Will: But a little practice makes it much easier over time.

Alison: Now that we have covered the U.K. side,

Will: Next, let’s talk about common mistakes people make when chatting!




Alison: Now let’s talk about common mistakes people make when chatting.

Will: Yes, because even when you mean well, it’s easy to slip up.

Alison: One big mistake is being too direct about private matters.

Will: For example, asking someone you just met, "Are you married?"

Alison: Or, "How much do you make at your job?"

Will: These questions can make people feel uncomfortable very fast.

Alison: Even if you are just curious, it feels like crossing a line.

Will: In English-speaking cultures, privacy is very important.

Alison: People like to choose when and how much they share.

Will: So instead of asking private questions, focus on safe topics.

Alison: You can ask, "What do you like to do in your free time?"

Will: Or, "Have you been to any good restaurants lately?"

Alison: These questions are open and friendly.

Will: They give the other person a chance to share what they want.

Alison: Another common mistake is interrupting or jumping into sensitive talks.

Will: Sometimes, people get excited and cut in while others are speaking.

Alison: This can seem rude, even if you do not mean to be.

Will: In English culture, it’s polite to let someone finish before you speak.

Alison: Also, when a sensitive topic comes up, it’s best not to dig deeper.

Will: If someone mentions a hard time, do not ask for all the details.

Alison: Instead, show you care without pushing.

Will: You can say, "I’m sorry to hear that," and then move the talk forward.

Alison: If you are not sure, follow the other person’s lead.

Will: If they want to share more, they will.

Alison: If not, give them space.

Will: So, how can you avoid these mistakes?

Alison: First, think before you ask.

Will: Ask yourself, "Would I feel okay if someone asked me this?"

Alison: If the answer is no, better skip the question.

Will: Second, listen more than you talk.

Alison: Listening shows respect and makes the talk more balanced.

Will: Third, learn to read body language.

Alison: If someone looks tense or answers very short, it’s a sign to change the topic.

Will: Fourth, have a few safe topics ready in your mind.

Alison: Like hobbies, movies, pets, or recent travels.

Will: These topics are easy for most people to enjoy.

Alison: Fifth, be ready to laugh off small awkward moments.

Will: If you realize you asked a bad question, smile and move on.

Alison: You can say, "Oops, sorry, I did not mean to get too personal!"

Will: A little humor can save the moment.

Alison: And remember, practice makes better.

Will: The more you talk with different people, the more natural it will feel.

Alison: We all make mistakes sometimes, and that’s okay.

Will: What matters is how you handle them.

Alison: So, stay calm, stay kind, and keep learning.

Will: That’s the true secret to great conversations.

Alison: Next, we are going to share some of our own funny or awkward stories!

Will: Trust me, you will not want to miss these.




Alison: Now it is story time!

Will: Oh yes, time to hear about some of our own awkward moments.

Alison: I will go first.

Will: Go ahead, Alison.

Alison: When I first moved to the U.S., I was very open with people.

Alison: I thought asking personal questions showed care.

Will: A very common idea in some cultures.

Alison: Yes, but it backfired one time at a school event.

Alison: I asked a mother, "How much does your husband make?"

Will: Oh no, Alison!

Alison: Yes, she smiled, but her eyes said, "Why would you ask that?"

Will: I can almost see the awkward silence that followed.

Alison: It felt like the longest five seconds of my life.

Will: What did you do next?

Alison: I quickly laughed and said, "Sorry, I am still learning American ways!"

Will: Good save!

Alison: After that, I learned to stick to safer topics like sports or school activities.

Will: A smart move, and a lesson you will never forget.

Alison: Definitely not!

Will: Now, it is my turn to share.

Alison: I cannot wait to hear yours.

Will: When I was new in the U.K., I loved to crack jokes to break the ice.

Alison: That sounds like you!

Will: One day, I joked with a co-worker, "You must be rich with all your overtime!"

Alison: Oh no, I see where this is going.

Will: He gave me a very cold look and said, "I work because I have to."

Alison: Ouch, that must have been painful.

Will: It was, and I felt so bad.

Alison: What did you do to fix it?

Will: I apologized and said, "Sorry, I was only teasing, I did not mean to be rude."

Alison: A good, honest way to handle it.

Will: After that, I learned that in Britain, teasing about money is risky.

Alison: Even if you mean it as a joke.

Will: Exactly, humor is fine, but you need to know where the lines are.

Alison: So, what is the big lesson from both our stories?

Will: Always be careful when talking about money or private matters.

Alison: And when in doubt, choose safe and happy topics.

Will: Also, if you make a mistake, own it and apologize politely.

Alison: People usually forgive you if they see you are sincere.

Will: And a little humility goes a long way.

Alison: These lessons helped me become better at small talk.

Will: And they made me more aware of cultural differences too.

Alison: Which is so important when you are learning a new language.

Will: Yes, language is not just words.

Alison: It is feelings, culture, and respect all mixed together.

Will: Well said, Alison!

Alison: Thanks, Will!

Will: Now that you know our embarrassing stories,

Alison: Let’s move on to some practical tips for better chats!




Alison: Now, let’s talk about how to smoothly change the topic if you need to.

Will: Yes, because sometimes you feel a chat is getting too heavy or awkward.

Alison: One easy way is using phrases like, "Speaking of..."

Will: For example, if someone talks about work and you want to change, you can say,

Will: "Speaking of busy days, have you watched any good movies lately?"

Alison: This links the old topic to a new, lighter one.

Will: It feels natural and polite.

Alison: Another good phrase is, "By the way..."

Will: You can use it to bring up something totally different.

Alison: Like, "By the way, did you hear about the new cafe downtown?"

Will: This moves the talk without sounding rude.

Alison: If you want to avoid a sensitive topic, you can also say,

Alison: "That’s an interesting thought. Let’s talk about that another time."

Will: This way, you show respect but set a boundary.

Alison: It works well when politics, religion, or money come up.

Will: Here’s another handy line, "I’m not sure about that, but..."

Alison: Then quickly bring up a safer subject.

Will: For example, "I’m not sure about that, but I heard the weather will be nice this weekend!"

Alison: People often welcome a happy topic like weather or fun plans.

Will: Now, when should you use these phrases?

Alison: Use them when you feel the mood getting tense.

Will: Or when you sense someone is uncomfortable.

Alison: Also, when you know a topic could lead to strong opinions.

Will: Like politics at a family party!

Alison: Yes, it is better to keep the peace than win a debate.

Will: Let’s show a quick role-play.

Alison: Sure, you ask a tricky question.

Will: "What do you think about the election results?"

Alison: "Oh, that’s a tricky one! Speaking of changes, have you tried the new app everyone is talking about?"

Will: Perfect move!

Alison: It sounds friendly and keeps things light.

Will: Here’s another one.

Alison: Go ahead.

Will: "So, how much do you pay for your house?"

Alison: "Haha, that’s above my pay grade! By the way, I saw a funny movie last night."

Will: Smooth and polite again.

Alison: Practicing these lines makes you more confident.

Will: And it shows you know how to handle tricky talks.

Alison: It also makes you sound more natural in English.

Will: Remember, the goal is to keep conversations happy and easy.

Alison: And a little humor always helps.

Will: So next time you feel stuck, you know what to say!

Alison: Try it out and see how well it works.

Will: Coming up, we will wrap up with a quick review and a special invite for you!




Alison: Alright, let’s wrap up today’s talk.

Will: We covered a lot of ground about tricky conversations.

Alison: First, we learned why some topics are better avoided.

Will: Culture, background, and personal feelings all play a big role.

Alison: Then, we looked at what topics to stay away from in the U.S.

Will: Money, politics, and religion are the top three.

Alison: We also explored how Brits handle these talks differently.

Will: In Britain, privacy, modesty, and careful humor are key.

Alison: We shared some common mistakes people make during chats.

Will: Like being too direct or pushing too deep into personal matters.

Alison: And we gave real tips on how to avoid these errors.

Will: Simple changes in your questions can make a big difference.

Alison: We even shared some of our own funny and awkward stories.

Will: Yes, because mistakes are part of the learning journey!

Alison: Plus, we gave you helpful phrases to steer away from bad topics.

Will: Like using "Speaking of..." or "By the way..."

Alison: These small tools make a big difference in real conversations.

Will: We hope today’s episode helps you feel more ready to chat in English.

Alison: And more confident when meeting new people from different cultures.

Will: Now, we would love to hear from you!

Alison: Have you ever had an awkward moment during a chat?

Will: Or do you have a smart trick to move a talk to safer ground?

Alison: Please share your story in the comment section below!

Will: We read all your comments and enjoy hearing your experiences.

Alison: Your stories help us learn and laugh together.

Will: Plus, your questions could inspire future topics.

Alison: So do not be shy, write to us after this episode.

Will: Also, if you found today’s lesson helpful, please subscribe to our channel.

Alison: That way, you won’t miss any of our future lessons.

Will: And remember to turn on the CC subtitles if you need them.

Alison: They are available in many languages to help you follow along.

Will: Thanks so much for joining us today!

Alison: We had a great time chatting with you.

Will: Keep practicing, stay curious, and keep your talks light and kind.

Alison: And we will see you next time on Effortless English Podcasts.

Will: Bye for now!

Alison: Bye everyone!





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