Thursday, May 8, 2025

How to Break Bad Habits for Good. | Ep. 46

 Effortless English Podcasts

Effortless English Chat

How to Train Your English Ears from Zero.

https://youtu.be/Sz-jwHskXe4

Alex: Hi everyone, welcome back to Effortless English Podcasts.

Alex: I'm Alex.

Luna: And I'm Luna!

Alex: Today, we’re talking about something that almost everyone struggles with—bad habits.

Luna: Oh yes. Like eating chips at midnight or checking your phone every five minutes.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: We all have something we wish we could stop doing.

Alex: But for some reason, it just keeps coming back.

Luna: It’s like those bad habits have their own little power switch that turns on whenever we try to change.

Alex: Right.

Alex: And even when we want to stop, we often feel stuck.

Alex: Take procrastination, for example.

Alex: You tell yourself you’ll just take a short break.

Alex: Next thing you know, it’s three hours later and you’ve watched twenty cat videos.

Luna: Hey, those cat videos are important emotional support!

Alex: Sure, sure.

Alex: But seriously, changing habits isn’t easy.

Luna: People try so many things—new apps, planners, routines—but they often fall back.

Alex: And that’s not because people are lazy or weak.

Alex: It’s because habits are deep.

Alex: They’re wired into our brain through repetition.

Luna: And sometimes, they’re not even about the habit itself.

Luna: It’s about what we feel when we do it.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: That’s why we’re diving into this topic today.

Luna: We’ll talk about why habits are so hard to break, even when we know they’re bad.

Alex: And we’ll also look at what science says about how to actually fix them.

Luna: And don’t worry, we’re not just going to throw big theories at you.

Alex: Yeah, we’ll also share real stories, useful tips, and some laughs along the way.

Luna: So if you’ve ever tried and failed to change a habit, this episode is for you.

Alex: Before we dive in, a quick reminder.

Alex: You can find the full text of today’s episode in the video description below.

Luna: And we’ve also got subtitles in multiple languages.

Alex: Just turn on the CC button if you need them.

Luna: Also, don’t forget to subscribe to our channel if you haven’t already.

Alex: That way you won’t miss out on future episodes.

Luna: All right, let’s get started.

Alex: First up, we’re going to explore why bad habits are so tough to change.

Alex: Spoiler: it’s not because your willpower is weak.

Luna: And it’s definitely not because you’re lazy.

Alex: There’s a whole science behind it.

Luna: But before we jump into all that brain talk, let’s quickly list a few habits we’ve all dealt with.

Alex: Like staying up too late when you know you should sleep.

Luna: Or checking your phone first thing in the morning, before even brushing your teeth.

Alex: Or skipping exercise even when you promised yourself to start today.

Luna: Or opening delivery apps because cooking feels like rocket science.

Alex: Yes, exactly.

Alex: These things seem small, but over time, they build patterns.

Luna: And those patterns become automatic.

Alex: The good news is, you can change them.

Luna: Not overnight, but with small, smart steps.

Alex: So let’s dig into how habits work and how to reset them.

Luna: This is going to be fun.

Alex: And maybe a little painful too.

Luna: Painful?

Alex: Well, only if you realize you’ve been stuck in the same loop for years.

Luna: Oof, don’t remind me.

Alex: All right, now let’s get into the science behind all this.




Alex: So, let’s begin with a simple question.

Alex: Why are bad habits so hard to change?

Luna: I’ve always wondered that.

Luna: I mean, we know it’s bad.

Luna: We say we want to stop.

Luna: But somehow, we keep doing it again.

Alex: That’s because habits are like shortcuts for the brain.

Alex: When we do something over and over, our brain learns to do it without thinking.

Luna: Like driving the same way to work every day.

Alex: Yes, or brushing your teeth.

Alex: After enough practice, it becomes automatic.

Luna: So even bad habits can become automatic?

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Let’s say you check your phone when you're bored.

Alex: If you do that every time, your brain links “bored” with “phone scroll.”

Luna: Oh wow.

Luna: So I’m basically training my brain to reach for Instagram every time I feel empty inside?

Alex: In a way, yes.

Alex: And the more you do it, the stronger that habit loop gets.

Alex: Cue, routine, reward.

Luna: Sounds like a video game.

Alex: Kind of.

Alex: Let’s break that down.

Alex: Cue is the trigger—like feeling bored.

Alex: Routine is the habit—like checking your phone.

Alex: Reward is the feeling you get—like a small hit of dopamine.

Luna: Dopamine?

Alex: It’s a brain chemical that makes you feel good.

Luna: So my brain’s like, “Hey, that felt nice. Let’s do it again!”

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: And here’s the tricky part.

Alex: Our brains love things that feel easy and rewarding.

Alex: That’s where the comfort zone comes in.

Luna: You mean that place where we lie in bed and pretend life’s fine?

Alex: Yeah, pretty much.

Alex: The brain uses less energy when it sticks to what it knows.

Alex: So when you try to break a habit, your brain resists.

Luna: That explains why starting a new habit feels like climbing a hill.

Alex: It is like climbing.

Alex: You're building a new path in your brain, and it takes effort.

Alex: Meanwhile, the old path is still there, waiting, easy, smooth.

Luna: So, the moment you’re tired or stressed, your brain just slides back to the easy path.

Alex: Yep.

Alex: That’s where emotion comes in.

Alex: Bad habits often show up when we’re feeling bad—lonely, angry, bored.

Luna: Like eating chocolate after a fight with your boyfriend.

Alex: Or staying up late binge-watching shows to escape a bad day.

Alex: These habits become emotional coping tools.

Luna: So even if we know they’re unhealthy, they help us feel better for a moment.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: The problem is, the relief is short.

Alex: But the habit gets stronger every time we do it.

Luna: Ugh, that’s unfair.

Alex: It is.

Alex: But here’s the thing—knowing how habits form is the first step to changing them.

Luna: So the brain isn’t against us.

Luna: It’s just… lazy?

Alex: Efficient. Let’s say efficient.

Luna: Fine. Efficient.

Alex: That’s why we need smart strategies.

Alex: We can’t just use willpower alone.

Luna: Because willpower runs out, right?

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: It’s like a battery.

Alex: When you’re tired or stressed, it drains faster.

Luna: That’s why I always break my diet after a bad day.

Alex: And why people skip workouts when they’re overwhelmed.

Luna: Okay, so habits form through repetition.

Luna: The brain wants to save energy.

Luna: And emotions add fuel to the fire.

Alex: That’s a perfect summary.

Alex: In the next part, we’ll look at the most common bad habits people struggle with.

Luna: Let me guess—procrastination will be top of the list.

Alex: Oh, you know it.

Luna: Can’t wait to roast myself in that section.

Alex: Same here.

Alex: But don’t worry.

Alex: We’ll also talk about how to deal with them, one step at a time.




Alex: All right, let’s talk about some of the most common bad habits people struggle with.

Luna: Okay, let me guess again.

Luna: Procrastination is number one, right?

Alex: You bet.

Alex: Procrastination is like the king of bad habits.

Luna: Or maybe the villain.

Alex: Either way, it’s something we all fight with.

Alex: And it often shows up in small ways.

Alex: Like waiting until the last minute to do homework or reply to an email.

Luna: Or cleaning the kitchen only when guests are coming.

Alex: Yep.

Alex: The reason procrastination is hard to beat is because it gives us short-term relief.

Luna: You mean, when I avoid a task, I feel better for a while.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Your brain says, “Yay, no stress for now!”

Alex: But later, the work is still there.

Luna: And worse.

Alex: And more stressful.

Luna: So the cycle repeats.

Alex: The trick is to make the task feel small.

Alex: Instead of “I need to write a report,” say “I’ll write just one sentence.”

Luna: That actually works.

Luna: I’ve tried writing one sentence and ended up writing a full page.

Alex: That’s the power of starting.

Luna: Okay, what’s next?

Alex: Staying up too late.

Alex: Sleep problems are a big issue for many people.

Luna: Oh boy, this one hits me hard.

Luna: I always say I’ll sleep early, then suddenly it’s 2 a.m.

Alex: You’re not alone.

Alex: The problem is, night habits are hard to break because they’re tied to freedom.

Luna: What do you mean?

Alex: During the day, we follow rules.

Alex: But at night, it feels like our time.

Luna: So we scroll, watch, snack—because no one’s watching.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: But poor sleep adds up.

Alex: Less energy, bad mood, harder focus.

Luna: And more coffee the next day.

Alex: Which keeps the cycle going.

Alex: A good tip is to create a clear bedtime routine.

Luna: Like reading or dimming the lights.

Alex: Yes, and setting a fixed sleep time—even on weekends.

Luna: Ouch. That part hurts.

Alex: I know, but it works.

Luna: Okay, next bad habit?

Alex: Constant phone use.

Luna: Oh no. Here we go.

Alex: This one is huge.

Alex: Most people touch their phone hundreds of times a day.

Luna: I believe it.

Luna: I even check my phone while brushing my teeth.

Alex: That’s multitasking gone wrong.

Luna: I call it efficiency.

Alex: Studies show phone use can break our focus.

Alex: It takes over twenty minutes to fully return to a task after a distraction.

Luna: And that’s if we return at all.

Alex: Right.

Alex: One way to fight this is to use phone-free zones.

Luna: Like no phone at the dinner table.

Alex: Or turning off notifications during work.

Alex: Also, tracking your screen time helps.

Luna: Yeah, seeing the number can be a shock.

Alex: That shock can lead to change.

Luna: Okay, what’s the final one on our list?

Alex: Not moving enough.

Alex: Sitting too long.

Alex: It’s a silent bad habit.

Luna: It doesn’t feel like a problem, but it is.

Alex: Too much sitting affects blood flow, muscles, and even mood.

Luna: I’ve felt that.

Luna: After hours of sitting, I feel tired but not in a good way.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: The body needs motion.

Alex: But most people work at desks and forget to move.

Luna: So what can we do?

Alex: Simple steps.

Alex: Stand up every 30 minutes.

Alex: Walk during phone calls.

Luna: Or stretch while watching TV.

Alex: Yes. Little movements matter.

Luna: So to sum up—

Luna: We’ve got procrastination, sleep issues, phone addiction, and no movement.

Alex: All common, all changeable.

Luna: And all connected to how we live every day.

Alex: In the next part, we’ll dig into how these habits are wired into the brain.

Luna: And what we can do to change the wiring.

Alex: Step by step.

Luna: Or scroll by scroll.

Alex: Hopefully less scrolling.

Luna: I’ll try.




Alex: So now that we’ve talked about the bad habits themselves, let’s go deeper.

Alex: Let’s look at what’s happening inside our minds.

Luna: You mean, like, brain science and psychology?

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: There’s a simple model from psychology that helps us understand habits.

Alex: It’s called the habit loop.

Luna: Sounds like a dance move.

Alex: Not quite.

Alex: It has three parts—cue, routine, and reward.

Luna: Oh, we mentioned this earlier!

Alex: Yes, but now let’s break it down more clearly.

Alex: The cue is what triggers the habit.

Alex: It could be a time, a feeling, a place, or even a person.

Luna: Like feeling bored or seeing your phone.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Then comes the routine—the actual behavior.

Luna: Like opening a social media app.

Alex: Right.

Alex: And the reward is what you get from it—like a feeling of connection or fun.

Luna: Even if it’s just for two seconds.

Alex: Yes.

Alex: That feeling is enough to teach your brain, “Do it again next time.”

Luna: That explains a lot.

Alex: The problem is, many of us aren’t aware of this loop.

Alex: It happens automatically.

Luna: So we keep doing the habit without thinking about it.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: That’s where the brain’s energy-saving system comes in.

Luna: Energy-saving? Like low-power mode?

Alex: Kind of.

Alex: The brain uses up to 20% of the body’s energy.

Alex: So it loves to create shortcuts.

Alex: Habits are those shortcuts.

Luna: So once something becomes a habit, it saves brain power.

Alex: Yes.

Alex: That’s why change feels hard.

Alex: You’re asking the brain to use more energy.

Luna: And it says, “No thanks, I like this lazy loop.”

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: The brain will choose the easy path unless you make a clear effort.

Luna: So awareness is key.

Luna: You have to notice the cue before you can change the routine.

Alex: Right.

Alex: And you can’t just remove a habit—you have to replace it.

Luna: Replace the routine, but keep the same cue and reward?

Alex: That’s one proven way.

Alex: Like, if stress is the cue and smoking is the routine, try deep breathing instead.

Luna: So the stress still comes, but you respond differently.

Alex: Exactly.

Luna: That makes sense.

Luna: But what about the stories we tell ourselves?

Alex: Ah, now we’re talking about cognitive bias.

Luna: Oh boy, sounds fancy.

Alex: It just means the brain tries to explain its own behavior—even if it’s not logical.

Luna: Like saying, “I deserve this cake because today was hard.”

Alex: Yes!

Alex: That’s reward rationalization.

Alex: You justify a habit because it fits your mood or belief.

Luna: Even if you know deep down it’s not helping.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: That’s how habits hide behind good-sounding excuses.

Luna: Like, “I’ll start tomorrow” or “One more time won’t hurt.”

Alex: Those are classic ones.

Alex: And they help the habit survive.

Luna: Wow, so habits have a whole defense system.

Alex: Pretty much.

Alex: The brain is smart—but sometimes, too smart.

Alex: It protects the old ways because they feel safe.

Luna: So to change, we need to break the story too.

Alex: Yes.

Alex: Ask yourself, “Is this really true?”

Alex: Or “What else could I do instead?”

Luna: It’s like talking back to your own thoughts.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: That’s called metacognition—thinking about your thinking.

Luna: Sounds deep, but useful.

Alex: It is.

Alex: The more aware you are of your thought patterns, the more power you have to change them.

Luna: So habit change is not just about actions.

Luna: It’s also about beliefs.

Alex: Right.

Alex: Beliefs, emotions, and routines all work together.

Luna: And if we can shift one piece, the whole system can change.

Alex: That’s the idea.

Luna: Okay, I’m ready to hack my brain.

Alex: Great, because next, we’re looking at science-backed methods to do exactly that.

Luna: Let’s go!




Alex: All right, now that we understand how habits work, let’s talk about how to change them.

Luna: Finally, the good part.

Luna: Tell me there’s hope.

Alex: There is.

Alex: And the first method is something called replacement.

Luna: Replace a bad habit with a good one, right?

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: You don’t just remove a habit—you replace it.

Alex: The cue stays the same, but you switch the routine.

Luna: So if I eat snacks when I’m bored, I can try drinking water or going for a walk?

Alex: That’s a perfect example.

Alex: Or if stress makes you want to scroll your phone, you could try deep breathing or journaling.

Luna: But what if the new habit feels boring?

Alex: That’s normal.

Alex: At first, it won’t feel as satisfying.

Alex: But over time, the brain starts to link the new routine with the same reward.

Luna: So the key is to make the replacement easy and repeatable.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Don’t choose something complicated.

Alex: Keep it simple, or your brain won’t stick with it.

Luna: Got it.

Luna: What’s next?

Alex: The second method is micro habits—or mini habits.

Luna: Oh, I’ve heard of this.

Luna: Like doing one push-up a day?

Alex: Yes.

Alex: The idea is to make the habit so small, it’s too easy to skip.

Alex: That way, your brain won’t resist.

Luna: And once I start, I might do more.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Starting is the hardest part.

Alex: Micro habits help you start.

Luna: So instead of “read 30 pages,” I can say “just open the book.”

Alex: That’s the trick.

Alex: It sounds silly, but it works.

Alex: Because once the action begins, momentum builds.

Luna: It’s like tricking your brain in a good way.

Alex: Yep.

Alex: And the goal isn’t to do a lot.

Alex: It’s to do it every day.

Luna: That’s powerful.

Alex: The third method is habit tracking.

Luna: You mean writing it down?

Alex: Yes.

Alex: When you track your habits, you see your progress.

Alex: It creates a reward in your brain.

Luna: Like checking off a box?

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: That small checkmark feels good.

Alex: It tells your brain, “Nice job, let’s keep going.”

Luna: I’ve seen habit apps that show streaks.

Luna: And I feel sad when the streak breaks.

Alex: That’s the idea.

Alex: Streaks build motivation.

Alex: And data gives feedback.

Alex: You see what’s working and what’s not.

Luna: So I should track every day?

Alex: Ideally, yes.

Alex: You don’t need a fancy tool.

Alex: A simple notebook works too.

Luna: Or a whiteboard with stickers!

Alex: If stickers help, use stickers.

Alex: The point is to build awareness and consistency.

Luna: And maybe celebrate small wins.

Alex: Absolutely.

Alex: When you reach a goal—even a small one—give yourself a reward.

Luna: Like watching a show guilt-free.

Alex: Or having your favorite snack—if that’s not the habit you’re trying to break.

Luna: Good point.

Alex: So, to sum up: replace bad habits with better ones.

Alex: Start small with micro steps.

Alex: And track your progress to stay motivated.

Luna: I like that.

Luna: It feels doable.

Alex: That’s the key—make it doable.

Alex: Don’t aim for perfect.

Alex: Aim for consistent.

Luna: That’s a great reminder.

Alex: Coming up next, we’ll look at one specific habit—procrastination—and how to deal with it.

Luna: Oh, my greatest enemy.

Alex: Mine too.

Luna: Let’s face it head-on.





Alex: All right, time to talk about procrastination.

Alex: The habit of putting things off again and again.

Luna: This one hits hard.

Luna: I’ve delayed washing dishes for three days.

Alex: That’s not so bad.

Alex: I once delayed paying a bill until the service stopped.

Luna: Oof, you win.

Alex: But why do we procrastinate?

Alex: One big reason is perfectionism.

Luna: You mean, we wait because we want it to be perfect?

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: We think, “If I don’t have time to do it right, I won’t do it at all.”

Luna: That’s me.

Luna: I’ll stare at a blank screen because I’m scared to write the wrong thing.

Alex: That fear stops action.

Alex: But doing nothing is worse than doing it imperfectly.

Luna: True, but tell that to my brain.

Alex: I get it.

Alex: Another cause is time distortion.

Luna: What’s that?

Alex: It’s when you feel like a task will take forever, even if it won’t.

Luna: Oh, like thinking cleaning will take two hours when it only takes twenty minutes.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Or believing you need three hours of focus, so you never start.

Luna: But once I do start, it’s usually not that bad.

Alex: That’s the trick.

Alex: The idea of the task is more painful than the task itself.

Luna: That’s so true.

Luna: But how do we beat that feeling?

Alex: First, we need to look at the things we tell ourselves.

Luna: Like what?

Alex: Things like, “I’ll do it later,” or “I work better under pressure.”

Luna: Or “I’m too tired right now.”

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: These are comfort phrases.

Alex: They sound helpful but keep us stuck.

Luna: So we need to replace the self-talk too?

Alex: Yes.

Alex: Try saying, “I’ll just do five minutes” or “Let’s see how far I get.”

Luna: That sounds easier to agree with.

Alex: It lowers the pressure.

Alex: And once you begin, the fear often fades.

Luna: Okay, give me some tools.

Alex: One great tool is the Pomodoro Technique.

Luna: Tomato what?

Alex: It’s a time system that uses 25-minute focus blocks.

Alex: You work for 25 minutes, then take a 5-minute break.

Luna: That sounds doable.

Alex: It builds urgency without feeling heavy.

Luna: I could do that.

Alex: Another method is time blocking.

Luna: You mean, setting a fixed time for tasks?

Alex: Yes.

Alex: Instead of saying “I’ll write later,” you block 10–11 a.m. for writing.

Alex: It creates structure.

Luna: Like making an appointment with myself.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: And here’s one more tip—have a clear starting point.

Luna: Why is that important?

Alex: Because “start working” is vague.

Alex: But “open the file and write the title” is clear.

Luna: So I don’t need to plan the whole task.

Luna: I just need to know the first move.

Alex: Right.

Alex: Once you begin, your brain starts rolling.

Luna: I’ve felt that.

Luna: After starting, I usually don’t want to stop.

Alex: That’s the power of starting.

Alex: Momentum beats motivation.

Luna: So, beat procrastination with structure, small starts, and time tricks.

Alex: You got it.

Luna: I feel ready to face my to-do list.

Alex: One tomato at a time.




Alex: All right, now that we’ve talked about theories and tips, let’s share some personal stuff.

Luna: Time for true confessions.

Alex: Let me start.

Alex: I used to be terrible at going to the gym.

Luna: No way, you work out all the time now.

Alex: Not always.

Alex: I used to buy memberships and go once.

Alex: Then I’d say, “I’ll go next week.”

Alex: But next week never came.

Luna: Classic.

Alex: So I changed my approach.

Alex: I made it a rule: I only had to go for ten minutes.

Luna: That’s it?

Alex: Yep.

Alex: I told myself, “Even if I just stretch and leave, it counts.”

Luna: Did you ever leave after ten minutes?

Alex: Once.

Alex: Every other time, I stayed longer.

Alex: The hard part was just getting there.

Luna: That’s genius.

Alex: I also kept my gym bag in the car.

Alex: No thinking, no packing—just go.

Luna: You built a low-friction system.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Make the good habit easy, and the bad habit hard.

Luna: Did it work right away?

Alex: It took a few weeks.

Alex: But after a month, it became part of my day.

Alex: Like brushing teeth.

Luna: Wow.

Luna: Okay, my turn.

Luna: I once tried to wake up at 5 a.m. every day.

Alex: Why would you do that to yourself?

Luna: I read a book that said early risers are more successful.

Alex: And?

Luna: I failed after three days.

Luna: I was cranky, tired, and late to everything.

Alex: Sounds like torture.

Luna: But I learned something.

Luna: I wasn’t failing because I was lazy.

Luna: I failed because the habit didn’t fit me.

Alex: That’s important.

Luna: So I stopped trying to be a morning person.

Luna: Instead, I built an evening wind-down routine.

Alex: Like what?

Luna: I stop using screens after 9 p.m., light a candle, and read a book.

Alex: That sounds relaxing.

Luna: It helped me sleep better.

Luna: And that made mornings easier—without forcing them.

Alex: So instead of chasing a trendy habit, you made your own.

Luna: Exactly.

Luna: It taught me that habits need to match you.

Alex: Not every tip works for everyone.

Luna: Right.

Luna: You have to test, tweak, and try again.

Alex: And be kind to yourself in the process.

Luna: Always.

Alex: In the end, it’s not about doing things perfectly.

Alex: It’s about showing up.

Luna: And finding what sticks.

Alex: If we can do it, so can you.




Alex: All right, let’s move on to something really important—how to keep the change going.

Luna: Because starting is great, but staying on track is the real challenge.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: One way to make habits stick is by changing your environment.

Luna: You mean like rearranging your room?

Alex: Sometimes, yes.

Alex: Let’s say you want to eat healthier.

Alex: Keep fruit on the counter and hide the chips.

Luna: Out of sight, out of mind.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: The less friction, the easier the habit.

Alex: Make good habits obvious and bad ones harder to reach.

Luna: Like putting your phone in another room during study time?

Alex: That’s a great one.

Alex: Or setting workout clothes by your bed the night before.

Luna: I’ve tried that.

Luna: It makes it harder to say “no” in the morning.

Alex: That’s the point.

Alex: You shape your space to shape your behavior.

Luna: Okay, but what about people?

Luna: Habits feel easier when I’m doing them with friends.

Alex: That brings us to the second point—support systems.

Alex: People make a huge difference.

Alex: Share your goal with a friend or find an accountability partner.

Luna: Someone who checks on your progress.

Alex: Yes.

Alex: It can be a workout buddy, a group chat, or even a family member.

Luna: Or you can use apps.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Habit-tracking apps can remind you, show streaks, and send little rewards.

Luna: One app even grows a tree every time you stay focused.

Alex: That’s the Forest app.

Alex: Small digital rewards can boost motivation.

Alex: You can also create your own reward system.

Luna: Like buying a small gift after seven days of success?

Alex: That’s a great idea.

Alex: Rewards don’t have to be big—just meaningful.

Luna: Even taking a break or watching a favorite show feels good when it’s earned.

Alex: Right.

Alex: Rewards make the brain associate the habit with good feelings.

Alex: That helps it stick.

Luna: But what if I mess up?

Luna: What if I break the habit after a few days?

Alex: Great question.

Alex: That leads to our last point—how to handle failure.

Luna: Because it happens.

Alex: Yes, to everyone.

Alex: Missing one day isn’t the problem.

Alex: The problem is thinking, “I failed, so I’ll quit.”

Luna: I’ve done that.

Luna: Miss one workout and then stop for a month.

Alex: It’s called the “what-the-heck” effect.

Luna: That’s a real thing?

Alex: Yes, in psychology.

Alex: One mistake makes us feel like we ruined everything.

Luna: So we give up.

Alex: But one slip doesn’t erase your progress.

Alex: The goal is to bounce back fast.

Luna: Like saying, “Okay, that happened. Now back to it.”

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: You can even plan for failure.

Luna: Plan to fail?

Alex: No, plan what to do after a miss.

Alex: Like, “If I skip a day, I’ll double down tomorrow.”

Luna: Or “I’ll text my friend for a boost.”

Alex: Yes.

Alex: Make a recovery plan part of your habit system.

Luna: That way, one small fall doesn’t turn into a total crash.

Alex: Right.

Alex: Long-term success is about getting back on track again and again.

Luna: I like that.

Luna: It feels more forgiving.

Alex: And more realistic.

Alex: Because life happens, but we can still move forward.

Luna: One good habit at a time.




Alex: Let’s take some time to answer questions we often hear about changing habits.

Luna: Because we know this topic brings up a lot of “what ifs.”

Alex: First one—how long does it take to form a new habit?

Luna: Ooh, the big one.

Luna: I’ve heard 21 days, 30 days, even 90.

Alex: The truth is, there’s no one-size-fits-all number.

Alex: A 2009 study found it takes anywhere from 18 to 254 days.

Luna: Whoa, that’s a big range.

Alex: It depends on the habit, the person, and how often it’s done.

Alex: On average, it takes about 66 days.

Luna: So don’t give up if week two feels messy.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: If you miss a day, that doesn’t restart the whole process.

Alex: Just get back on track.

Luna: Progress isn’t a straight line.

Alex: It’s more like a squiggly path.

Luna: Full of bumps and little wins.

Alex: Just focus on showing up.

Alex: Keep going and let the habit grow with time.

Luna: Okay, next question.

Luna: What if I know I need to change—but I just don’t want to?

Alex: That’s more common than people admit.

Alex: Change takes energy, and it’s normal to feel resistance.

Luna: I’ve had that.

Luna: Like knowing I should sleep early, but wanting to watch “just one more episode.”

Alex: That’s the inner conflict—logic vs. emotion.

Alex: One way to deal with this is to focus on your “why.”

Luna: You mean the deeper reason?

Alex: Yes.

Alex: Ask yourself, “What will this habit help me become?”

Luna: Like, “If I sleep early, I’ll have more energy and feel better.”

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Make that benefit clear and emotional.

Alex: Then take one small step—don’t wait for full motivation.

Luna: Because waiting for motivation is like waiting for perfect weather.

Alex: Great way to put it.

Alex: Action often creates motivation, not the other way around.

Luna: So even if I don’t feel like it, I can still act.

Alex: And that small action can shift your mindset.

Luna: Okay, last question—do you have one simple trick that works for almost anyone?

Alex: Yes.

Alex: I call it the “two-minute rule.”

Luna: I’m listening.

Alex: Whatever new habit you want to start, make the first step doable in two minutes or less.

Luna: Like “read one page” instead of “read for an hour”?

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Or “put on workout shoes” instead of “go to the gym.”

Luna: It feels so small that your brain won’t say no.

Alex: Right.

Alex: The goal is not performance—it’s consistency.

Alex: Once you’ve started, you can go further.

Luna: So it’s like unlocking the door.

Alex: Yes.

Alex: Start small, win early, repeat often.

Luna: I love that.

Luna: It makes habits feel less scary.

Alex: And more possible.

Alex: So if you’re listening and don’t know where to begin—try the two-minute rule.

Luna: Try anything that gets you moving, even just a little.

Alex: Because small steps lead to real change.




Alex: All right, let’s wrap things up.

Alex: We’ve talked about why bad habits are so hard to break.

Luna: Because our brains love routines, even the unhealthy ones.

Alex: Right.

Alex: They save energy and give quick rewards.

Alex: That’s why change feels like swimming upstream.

Luna: But we also shared ways to make change easier.

Luna: Like replacing bad habits, starting with tiny steps, and tracking progress.

Alex: We explored tools like the Pomodoro method, time blocking, and the two-minute rule.

Luna: And we reminded you to be kind to yourself along the way.

Alex: Because building new habits isn’t about being perfect.

Alex: It’s about being consistent.

Luna: And learning what works for you, not just copying what works for others.

Alex: Exactly.

Alex: Even if progress is slow, every small step counts.

Luna: You might not see big results right away.

Luna: But your brain is changing, little by little.

Alex: Each time you choose the better path, you’re building a stronger habit loop.

Luna: So don’t be too hard on yourself.

Luna: Change takes time, and time is your ally.

Alex: Whether it’s quitting procrastination, sleeping earlier, or moving more, it starts with one decision.

Luna: Then another.

Luna: Then another.

Alex: And if you mess up?

Alex: That’s okay.

Alex: The secret is not in never failing—but in always starting again.

Luna: So if you’re listening and feel stuck, we want you to know—you’re not alone.

Alex: We’ve been there.

Alex: We’re still figuring it out too.

Luna: But we’re doing it.

Luna: And so can you.

Alex: Let us know in the comments what habit you’re working on.

Luna: Or share a small win from this week!

Luna: We’d love to hear your stories.

Alex: And if this episode helped you, don’t forget to subscribe.

Alex: That way you won’t miss out on more helpful content.

Luna: Also, remember the full text of this episode is linked in the description.

Luna: And subtitles are available in many languages—just turn on CC.

Alex: Thanks so much for joining us today.

Luna: We’ll see you next time on Effortless English Podcasts.

Alex: Until then—

Luna: Take one step at a time.

Alex: And keep going.



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How to Stay Positive When Life Gets Tough. | Ep. 48

  Effortless English Podcasts Effortless English Chat How to Stay Positive When Life Gets Tough. https://youtu.be/Bl2LHz-W16I